Well it’s a long story but suffice it to say that my mother had an in-depth interview (out of respect for everyone – including my cherished readers – I won’t say “probing”) with the famous brainiac and one thing lead to another and then once or twice more. (Yes, that part still operates believe it or not!) Obviously, I’ve grown up with literary ambitions as evidenced by the past four months of daily stories on this blog but I’m also equally obsessed with numbers. Each of the previous stories that I’ve written is a kind of mathematical puzzle. I start with a “fake” author whose name I’ve chosen based on the number of consonants in their name. If you subtract the total number of consonants in their name from the total number of sentences in the story, you’ll arrive at a series of sums which points us in the direction of a grand unified theory combining quantum physics with Newtonian mechanics. I wanted to couch all this number crunching in language in order to get others interested and also stick it to the math community who’ve been disparaging the arts for too long.

   Today’s story is simple. It’s written in six sentences which just happens to be a number I really like.


A Connoisseur of the Self at the Door


    “Mom, there’s a guy at the door selling something,” the lanky, blond boy shouts up the tower of stairs but the fedora-topped man at the door corrects him. “He says that he’s not selling a thing per se but he’s offering a whole new outlook on the world and our place within it and really he just wants to give us a tip or two on how to fall asleep or wake up or even just talk to each other with our unique selves intact,” the blond boy shouts, takes a deep breath and then looks back at the man for a quick appraisal. The tall man pushes his hat back to scratch his forehead and then nods yes, well done. There are weighty footsteps upstairs in a world suspended high above everyday interactions. The blond boy cocks his head to catch the words shouted from above. “Sorry, we’re not home,” he says with deflated-blue eyes and he shuts the door.